Well, Now, You Listen Here Doctor Man!!

Note:  Readers, I was supposed to have my right lung w/tumor removed on May 13, 2011.  The doc did a brochoscoopy first and said the cancer had spread up into my trachea and he would have had to reconstruct the trachea and then re-implant the left main stem bronchus onto the trachea.  It is probable that I wouldn't have survived the operation...so he closed me up.  This blog is about my follow-up appointment with him.

Today I had an appt. with my surgical oncologist, we were supposed to discuss my treatment options.  This is what he told me:

"Go live what is left of your life."  

What?!!

My lymph nodes in my chest are full of cancer, so the cancer is in my lymphatic system.  We don't know if or where it has spread, we don't know for sure if I have metastic disease or not.  He said there is a good chance that my liver is involved.  He doesn't feel the need to do the test which would tell me what genetic markers are there, he says a PET Scan would be nice...but sometimes Carcinoid Tumors won't even light up on those.  Basically, I feel that he's given up on me.  He stated that the chemo could make me sicker than what I already am.  But, if the chemo could shrink the tumor and give me more years then that is what I want.  I'm not ready to give up just yet.  I get the feeling that my lack of insurance is a factor in what he's telling me....don't know.  I am really disappointed that he is giving up so easily on me.

Well, Mr. Doctor man....I'm not ready to sign up for hospice just yet.  He said he couldn't give me a time frame, and he can't because he's NOT God.  The tumor in my chest is (using his words) very angry and agressive and invasive.  Well, it's been in there for a least 8 years....so really what did he expect?!

So....I fight on.  I will find a doctor that will help me fight, I don't care what I have to do to make that happen!!!!!  My life is worth fighting for.  My gloves are on, I'm in the ring....waiting for the bell and for a doctor to help me win this fight.

Just another chapter in the story of my life.